Thursday, September 18, 2008

Pulled in Different Directions

With four children it is inevitable that I will have to be two (or more) places at the same time or have to choose which child will get my presence when it is required by more than one. Tonight is one of those occasions.

Matthew has his second football game of the season tonight but I have a child (Marlee) who has been running fever all day and doesn't feel well. Therefore, it is not advisable for her to be outside running around while I desire to cheer my son on. So, I had to make the difficult decision between two children who I want to believe need me equally. I know that in reality Matthew is a big boy and he understands the situation. Blake is there watching him play so it's not as if he is all alone. I know that with my brood there is no way under Heaven that I will ever be able to attend all of the activities my children are involved in, but as a mother, my heart desires to be there to support them and cheer for them whenever I can. Tonight it is much more necessary for me to be home tending to my sick child, so why do I still feel so torn?

I think as mothers, we desire to be superwomen who can do 50 different tasks exceptionally well and take care of everyone who resides under our roof with a smile always on our face. The reality is if we try to devote ourselves to perfection in every area we will fall miserably short. We can only do so much before we lose our sanity or make ourselves ill.

My heart longs to be cheering my son on the football field tonight, but my baby needs me at home. So I will accept the situation for what it is, wish my son good luck and pray that everyone will be well next Thursday night.

2 comments:

Ariel Allison Lawhon said...

Sometimes I think motherhood is the Guilt that Keeps on Giving...which is why a friend and I have decided to write a book called "How We (Don't) Get It All Done: Two Women, Ten Children, and an Addiction to Coffee (Creamer)"

And I think what makes it worse is that as women we raise the bar but are rarely vulnerable enough to show how much we struggle. So keep that chin up my friend, we're all in the same boat!

Tracy said...

Thanks, Ari.